Out of My Mind

(I had to come back and edit this one after some insight from Charity.  Thanks Charity!)

Hi, I am David, and I am a recovering people pleaser. Much of my life I have sought for the “praise of men.” I wanted to succeed because it felt good to have others praise me and complement me. It gave me an identity.

I live in the same small community I grew up in where I have pastored a church (www.sscommunitychurch.com)for the last 8 years. I know a lot of people in this area. God has blessed our ministry here and the church has grown. You can only imagine how that has fed the “people pleaser” in me. It has felt good to see this church grow - sometimes it has felt way too good. This is an area that God has been dealing with in a pretty big way over the last few years. I am seeking to care way more about what God thinks, and less about what others think.

God has his ways of making us deal with these issues, and boy he made me deal with it the other night. I heard a quote that said, “To inoculate me to the praise of man, God baptized me in the criticism of man so as to deliver me from the fear of man.” While it has been a joy seeing God at work at St. Simons Community Church over the last few years, my world has certainly shrunk. You can get to a place in a small town where everyone knows your business, or at least has an opinion of your business. As a pastor of a growing church, sometimes it feels like you have nowhere to run and hide. The more we have grown as a church, the harder it is to always please everyone. God has used this to strike at my people pleasing tendencies.

Then the other night, God used a circumstance in one of my children’s lives to make me and my wife deal further with our own junk. One of my children got a little aggressive in their athletic contest. I didn’t think it was over the line, but it was certainly pretty aggressive. Well the parents on the other team thought it was across the line and started calling out my child’s number telling him to reign it in. I could tell it hurt him. After the game, a mom from the other team came up to me and Amber. She goes to church with us and said she was defending our child. She said to the parents on her team, “That is my pastor’s child.” Well, they all wanted to know who her pastor was, and just what in the world kind of church was he running? (It wasn’t said quite like that, but you get the drift.)

How small do you think this little community felt all of a sudden? We weren’t just a nameless face seeking to make a difference for God. I am a pastor who is known by more people than I would care to be know by at times.   My call or mission from the Lord is no more important than every Christian out there who is seeking to serve the Lord.  As a pastor though sometimes, you feel like you are in the direct spotlight.  It is hard to feel like you can make a mistake or have a bad day without your spiritual commitment being called into question.  You can imagine the devil had a hey day with our emotions on the way home. We really felt our child had not acted maliciously. We talked with him about it, and he was frustrated that other parents felt he was playing unfair. He was upset they were calling his number out, and yelling at him. It was a tough night for all of us.

Amber and I talked about it though, and realized that our reputations are in the hands of God. We know we are not perfect parents, but we are very proactive. We teach, talk, encourage and discipline constantly. We do not dismiss wrong behavior, but our children are not perfect. They have struggles too.

The next morning, Amber and I decided not to listen to Satan’s taunts. Instead, we decided to turn it around and find the victory of God in that moment. We turned on a worship CD and praised God in the valley. We praised him for His work in our lives, and the lives of our children. We praised and worshiped Him, knowing that He is in control. It became a holy moment of sweet surrender and trust to our Lord Jesus. We praised Him from the valley and Jesus actually turned it into a mountain - a place of grace and joy. What started to feel like a defeat became a victory - a little more freedom from people pleasing. And that felt good! It still does!

Do you praise Him in the valley? Have you ever had a moment when God turned your valley into a mountain top? Be blessed,

DY